Support for Families

Donors and their families are very special people. They have given an extraordinary gift. At a most difficult time, a decision was made to give other individuals the opportunity for a longer and better quality of life.

Ontario Health (Trillium Gift of Life Network) offers a Donor Family Support program to donor families, providing the offer of continued support, the opportunity to communicate anonymously with recipients and recognition for their courage, compassion and generosity.

Should a family wish, their relationship with TGLN may continue through opportunities to volunteer or assist in other ways. If you’d like to find out more, you can reach our family services team at: familyservices@giftoflife.on.ca

Stories of hope

Every donor family and recipient has a unique story to tell, and a unique experience to share. We invite you to take a moment to read and share their journeys. It may even inspire you to share how donation or transplantation changed your life or that of your family. Your stories are not only inspirational, but also have the power to heal, so please consider contributing. It’s worth it.

Do you have a story you want to share?
Contact us: familyservices@giftoflife.on.ca

Thinking of writing
a letter to your loved
one’s recipient?

The decision to write to transplant recipients is a personal one. Sharing information about your loved one may help in the grieving process. The choice to write or not, is yours to make. If you prefer, you may choose to send a card during a special holiday or a ‘thinking of you’ card instead of a letter.

If you decide to write, here are some guidelines to help you.

Writing Guidelines

Grief Support Resources

As an organ and/or tissue donor family member there is no way to lessen or quicken the grieving process. Recovery from trauma and sadness is possible, but it takes time. You alone will set your own pace.

You don’t have to grieve alone. What’s Your Grief? is a website that features grief articles, courses, creative expression about shared experiences, community support and more.

Section 1: Helping Yourself with Grief

• Helping Yourself Heal When Someone Dies
• Helping Yourself Heal When Your Child Dies
• Helping Yourself Heal When Your Spouse Dies
• Helping Yourself Heal When a Parent Dies
• Helping Yourself When a Baby Dies
• Helping Yourself Heal During the Holiday Season
• Helping Dispel 5 Common Myths About Grief
• Helping Yourself Live When You Are Seriously Ill
• Helping Yourself Live When You Are Dying
• Exploring the Uniqueness of Your Suicide Grief
• Healing Your Traumatized Heart: Seeking Safety, Understanding, and Peace Part 1
• Healing Your Traumatized Heart: Seeking Safety, Understanding, and Peace Part 2
• Healing Your Grieving Body: Physical Practices for Mourners
• The Spiritual Path to Healing: An Introduction
• The Spiritual Path to Healing: Mourning Ideas, Part 1
• The Spiritual Path to Healing: Mourning Ideas, Part 2
• The Spiritual Path to Healing: Mourning Ideas, Part 3
• The Spiritual Path to Healing: Mourning Ideas, Part 4
• Dispelling the Misconceptions About Suicide and Grief and Mourning

Section 2: Helping Others with Grief

• Helping a Friend in Grief
• Helping a Man Who is Grieving
• Helping a Friend Who is Dying
• Helping a Friend Who is Seriously Ill
• Helping a Suicide Survivor Heal
• Helping a Homicide Survivor Heal
• Helping a Grandparent Who Is Grieving
• Helping a Grieving Friend in the Workplace
• Helping AIDS Survivors Heal
• Helping SIDS Survivors Heal
• Helping Your Family When a Member is Dying
• Helping Your Family When a Member is Seriously Ill
• Helping Your Family Cope When a Pet Dies
• Helping Your Family Decide if Organ and Tissue Donation is Right for You

Section 3: For and About Grieving Children and Teenagers

• Helping Children Cope with Grief
• Helping Teenagers Cope with Grief
• Helping Infants and Toddlers When Someone They Love Dies
• Helping Children with Funerals
• Helping Children Understand Cremation
• Helping a Child Who is Seriously Ill
• Helping a Child Who is Dying
• Helping Grieving Children at School
• Helping Bereaved Siblings Heal

Section 4: Funerals, Memorials, Cremation and Related Topics

• Helping Your Family Personalize the Funeral
• Helping Create a Meaningful Eulogy
• Ten Freedoms for Creating a Meaningful Funeral
• Why is the Funeral Ritual Important?

Section 5: Additional Resources

Dr. Wolfelt, Founder and Director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition has written two articles intended to provide a measure of comfort for those journeying through grief.

The Journey Through Grief

The Mourner's Bill of Rights

Additional Information

Donor Family Support Material

Ontario Health (Trillium Gift of Life Network) has developed a package of support materials as part of our continuing Family Services and Aftercare Program.

Donation after Death Determination by Circulatory Criteria

Donation after Death Determination by Circulatory Criteria (DCC) presents an opportunity for donor families to pay tribute to their loved one's decision to donate, creating a lasting impact. Families can take comfort in knowing that their loved one's generous donation has the potential to save and enhance the lives of many individuals in Ontario. Studies have shown that donation provides donor families with a sense of something positive during a most difficult time and assists them in their path to healing.

To read the common questions families often have about donation after death determination by circulatory criteria, click the link to our FAQ section below.

FAQ: Donation after Death Determination by Circulatory Criteria

Understanding Death Determination by Neurologic Criteria

Learning that your loved one has been severely injured and, despite their beating heart, has died is profoundly devastating. Terms like "brain death" or "death determination by neurologic criteria" can be confusing and overwhelming. With insights from medical professionals and families, we wish to clarify these terms and provide answers to common questions, offering support and understanding during this difficult time.

To read the common questions families often have about death determination by neurologic criteria, click the link to our FAQ section below.

FAQ: DEATH DETERMINATION BY NEUROLOGIC CRITERIA

Writing to Your Donor Family

This brochure aims at assisting transplant recipients in writing to their donor family. Inside are tips and suggestions on how to start and close your letter. Also, you can find sample phrases if you find yourself unable to find the words to express yourself.

View PDF

Your Role as Substitution Decision Maker

Role of a Substitute Decision Maker

As a SDM, your responsibility is to make or affirm decisions for your loved one who is unable to make their own. Key to these decisions are the wishes your loved one has already made known, their values, and their beliefs. If your loved one has already made a decision to donate, it is your responsibility as their SDM to follow through with this decision. If your loved one has not made their wishes known, it is your responsibility to consider your loved one’s values and beliefs to determine if donation is in keeping with these.

The Most Important Questions to Ask at This Time are:

• What would my loved one want if they could decide for themselves?
• What would they say if they were here right now?

Carrying out their decision is your responsibility. Acting on your loved one’s behalf can empower a lasting decision in keeping with your loved one’s life.

If your loved one had characteristics similar to those described next and had not registered as a donor, this information may help you with your decision on your loved one’s behalf.

Characteristics of Individuals Who Donate as Described by Their SDMs:

• A giving person
• A willingness to help others
• Wanting to leave a legacy
• Wanting a part of themselves to live on in others
• Feeling deep sympathy and empathy for the suffering and misfortune of others
• A desire to impact the world in a positive way
• Doing what they can to try to make the world a better place
• Strong moral principles and core values

Donation following Medical Assistance in Dying (MAID)

Ontario Health (Trillium Gift of Life Network [TGLN])’s mission is to save and enhance lives by honouring individuals’ decisions to donate organs and tissue. Individuals applying for Medical Assistance in Dying (MAID) may also have the opportunity to donate organs and tissue as part of their end-of-life plans.

To read the common questions families often have about Medical Assistance in Dying (MAID), click the link to our FAQ section below.

FAQ: Donation following Medical Assistance in Dying (MAID)